How to overcome fear.

fear is the killer of dreams. It’s corrosive like cancer but can’t surgically be removed. We see it everyday through the actions of strangers or loved ones. Whether it be a once beautiful woman caking on make up, because she can’t face aging with grace. Someone with incredible talent who is on the cusp of a breakthrough that fails due to self sabotage. Once fear unexpectedly works it’s way up the spines of great men and woman dissolving their stoic pose into a slouch. Crawling it’s way through the brain stem and finally attaching itself to the neurons firing away in are brain. Corrupting every thought into a manic, insecure, paranoid delusion. Which if allowed can even take the form of violence.

The only cure for fear is logic. We have to understand that fear is nothing more then a fleeting emotion due to pressure that is placed upon ourselves, by societies expectation, or the people around us, or our own high expectations. It does not exist. It’s nothing but a series of what if’s. The future does not exist. The past does not exist anymore. There for fear is nothingness. An abyss culminated in our imaginations.

We will all experience fear in our lives. Not one person excluded. Entertainers who have been in the game for decades still get butterflies before they step on stage. We all have to work our way through it. We all have coping mechanisms to deal with everyday anxieties. We take deep breathes, meditate, pray. Whatever thing makes us feel empowered to get through the day.

As children we were invincible. Our worlds were filled with never ending opportunity. “I’m going to be astronaut.” We might tell ourselves. It’s only until we get older having more experience with reality that makes us fickle and forget that at any moment in time we can change our lives for the better. Will it be hard? Absolutely. But is it impossible? Of course not.

There’s a teenage boy right now, through the corner of his eye looking at a pretty girl. He’s thinking to himself, “Man what I wouldn’t give to have her see me the way I see her.” What he doesn’t realize is that she will never see him the way he sees her. Which makes him miserable. That doesn’t make her a bad person. They just don’t go together. He doesn’t have the social confidence or the same interests as she does. His fantasies are simply him trying to force himself into a situation where he doesn’t belong. Why would you invite someone into your life who doesn’t have the capabilities to care for you. He just wants to have sex with her, but it’s not going happen. Meanwhile there’s a nice girl who sits behind him everyday who gets completely dismissed even though she does have similar interests and is closer to his social IQ.

Everyday as we meet different people from various walks of life. These people change our perceptions of what we believe to be possible or impossible for ourselves. We constantly compare ourselves to these people expanding that imaginary abyss until we find ourselves suffocating. “I’ll never be as smart as this person.” Of course not. You aren’t that person. We all have our own interests and skills we excel at.

That’s why I’m fixated on brilliant scientists. Specifically physicists. The way their brains operate is incredibly fascinating. But I would never place myself in comparison to them. I may not be a genius by any stretch of the imagination. But I know I’ve led a life that had brought me to conclusions that even their great minds haven’t thought of. It may have been something simple like a joke or an idea for a story. Not every thought has to change the world. Human beings are interesting in the sense that we all have something to offer. To want to be someone else is to deny everything that is interesting about you.

If it feels like you’re shackled to an anchor. Understand things won’t always go your way. Hence Bruce Lee’s philosophy of, “Flow like water my friend.” No matter how heavy that anchor feels. It only exists because we tell ourselves that it exists. Using every ounce of courage we can face any consequence of reality if our desire is great enough. Any fear can be broken down and rationalized. To quote Frank Herbert’s Dune:

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

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