I’m… let’s call it opinionated. If giving your two cents, literally cost two cents I would be homeless. I think it’s due to an inferiority complex wrapped in stubborness. I’m learning to let things go. I word things more thoughtfully. Sometimes doing this feels unbearably fake. Also depending on who you’re talking to, what your trying to say will never sink in if they’re equally stubborn. There’s just something about getting angry and letting everything out all at once that feels more satisfying. Yet every single time it’s followed by consequences. As a mature adult consequences are at every turn. Life becomes your parents, and you can’t lock yourself in your room, blasting music that screams, “f consequences, have fun!”
As soon as you air out everything you have to say and their face starts to sink. Those consequences hit you like a goddamn brick. Reminding you, that you are not the only one with strong emotions. If your satisfaction ends in someone else’s misery. You can no longer play the righteous indignation card. Whether you were in the right before is no longer relevant because you gave up communication to resolve the issue over the feeling of being right. I see now that having the last word is no longer as important as resolving the issue.
I try to slow down and explain myself more methodically. Not with the intention of being more witty but make my point in a way that opens up a dialogue because I’m not always right, and I don’t catch every detail that led to the result of our argument.
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